I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
