I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Randomize
