Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
