trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
