I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize