I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
