my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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