your room smells of hookers.
And success
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize