You really coming over, don't trick.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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