The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
