dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
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