I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize