Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
