We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
He felt like a one man threesome
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
