Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
