I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
