I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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