So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
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