Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Randomize
