Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
