i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
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