My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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