Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
