My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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