I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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