everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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