why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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