so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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