Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
