So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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