Ambien. No doubt about it.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I love you. Go after that dick
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
