We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize