i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
cat food counts as protein by the way
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
