stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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