I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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