You work out of a Hotel?
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize