Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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