I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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