Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
