dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
