friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
What drink are we having for lunch?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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