also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
