Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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