i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize