Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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