Taylor Swift is so right about you.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
