He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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