You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
