Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
no more duck duck goose at the bar
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
