69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
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