it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
